


Without a Dream

by GirlKnownSomewhere



Series: This is Now [2]
Category: The Monkees (Band), The Monkees (TV)
Genre: 1990s, Angst, Arguing, Band Fic, Cute, Drinking, F/M, Flirting, Holidays, Kissing, Older Man/Younger Woman, Reunions, Romance, Sequel, Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-17
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:20:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25345342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GirlKnownSomewhere/pseuds/GirlKnownSomewhere
Summary: Julianna and Peter's relationship is tested yet again, but this time during the UK portion of the Monkees' 1997 tour.
Relationships: Mike Nesmith/Victoria Kennedy, Peter Tork/OFC
Series: This is Now [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1835587
Kudos: 5





	1. A Better World

**Author's Note:**

> Not much to note this time around other than that I really ended up loving Peter/Julianna as a fic pairing and couldn't help but give them a little sequel to their multi-chap fanfic. Since Julianna is essentially an OFC, I did mess with the band's history a tiny bit more than I usually do again, but nothing unrealistic (though big fans will notice a huge historical retcon at the end of the last chapter, lol). Happy weekend and happy reading! 🎶💖
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own any part of the Monkees brand or the members' and Victoria Kennedy's likenesses (I own like 90% of Julianna, lol)

Ch. 1: A Better World

San Francisco, December 1996

Three months have passed since Julianna experienced an entire summer in LA with the Monkees and her life is now relatively back to normal. Or as normal as it can be with a famous music artist as your longtime companion. Peter was evidently right, the library offered her old position back to her almost as soon as she returned up north. The musician continued performing with his usual, local band away from his more popular group. Julianna and Victoria now sometimes kept in touch when they weren’t in Hollywood at the same time. Julianna’s hair was even back to its natural, big curls after spending six months keeping it wavy. Most importantly, her insecurities on her relationship with Peter and her paranoia on his out of town shows was virtually gone. 

It was presently Christmas Eve afternoon and Julianna was arriving home after a quick run to the store for the big holiday meal she had planned. There wasn’t going to be a festive dinner with family or friends this year, but she still wanted it to make it a special night just between her and Peter. As she entered through the front door, Julianna felt like she might be alone until she passed the garage entrance and found Peter’s car still parked. While placing a chocolate pastry she bought at a local bakery in the fridge for dessert later that night, she noticed a loaf of bread sitting on the second shelf. She sighed. “Peter, please keep the bread in the freezer unless you intend on eating it within a couple days,” she said with her voiced raised so he could hear her throughout the house. She placed the loaf in said freezer before continuing to speak. “This is such a weird habit you’ve pick—AH.”

Julianna suddenly felt a pair of hands snake around her waist and quickly shake her. “Hey,” she heard Peter’s voice into her ear as she let out a breath of relief. 

“God, you scared the crap out of me,” she exhaled as she turned to him and he properly embraced her. 

“Merry Christmas, Jules,” he greeted with a chuckle and then kissed her lips. She relaxed into his arms and hugged back.

“Merry Christmas, Pete,” she returned.

“Where’d you hide the presents?” He asked with a playful tone.

She snorted just as playfully. “Don’t get too excited just yet. It’s only us this year, so we’re opening them in the morning.”

He pulled her closer with a lopsided smile. “Well, that’s no fun,” he joked. “What about…” He lingered as his hands drifted to her hips.

She lightly nudged away with a tiny grin. “You’re not getting ‘that’ present ‘til later tonight anyway. What time is it?” Placing one hand on his shoulder she looked to the microwave clock to see it was quarter to 5:00 PM. “Well, I’ve been preparing this dinner since Monday, so I might as well start putting it together.”

“Christmas Eve dinner before 8:00?” Peter asked with a smirk. “What kind of Catholic are you anyway?”

“A bad one,” she replied simply. “And that’s because I’m not even Catholic, my family’s Lutheran.”

Peter gasped in fake shock. “An Italian Lutheran. Who’d a-thunk?”

Julianna nodded lazily in contentment. 

“Wait. Why did you make such a big deal over adding Advent colors to the decorations then?” He asked and motioned to a pink+purple colored Nativity scene set up by the living room window on the other end of the house.

She just shrugged. “Same reason I’m giving you a Christmas present even though your mom’s Jewish?”

He laughed. “Fair enough.”

“Anyways, I just wanted the house to look a little more interesting on top of the usual red and green shades.” She moved out of his arms to grab herself a glass of water.

“I left that loaf out for dinner. Just so you know,” he casually revealed as she was done using the faucet.

“Oh…well, that’s why heads-ups exist too, you know,” she responded plainly after a gulp of water and before moving to the fridge again.

Two and a half hours later, the couple were eating a nice, heavy Christmas dinner courtesy of Julianna. Peter had offered to assist in the cooking many times earlier in the week, but she just told him to consider it part of her holiday gift. The librarian had opted for a chicken this year, instead of a turkey or roast beef (and couldn’t help herself from teasing Peter about how he really couldn’t call himself vegetarian anymore). Along with the meat was stuffing, mashed potatoes+gravy, asparagus, and some bread on their plates while the pair were seated across each other. Julianna took a sip of her water glass after a satisfying bite of stuffing.

“See, wasn’t this a good idea to cook the chicken tonight?” She asked with a grin. “Now we can just enjoy the food on Christmas Day without any of the work.”

He nodded while swallowing a bite. “Yep, you are right. Not that I ever doubted your plan,” he added with a chuckle. He then paused for a couple seconds as if in realization and made a ‘heh’ sound.

“What?” She asked now curious.

“Nothing…This meal would’ve gone great with a red wine is all,” he said still smiling.

“We are not having wine,” she responded calmly, but seriously.

“Not so much for me. I was mainly thinking of you,” he expanded.

She reacted unperturbed. “It honestly doesn’t matter that much to me, really. Cheers,” she saluted while raising her water glass. 

He did the same back. “I’m just saying you can still have fun at home if you want. I know, this librarian secretly likes to have a good time away from the bookshelf,” he teased playfully.

“Sure. That’s exactly why I’m being considered for Director next spring,” she teased back.

Peter sported a genuine look of surprise. “You are? Really? That’s great!” He replied excited for her.

“Mm-hmm…I told you that, didn’t I” She asked skeptical of herself.

He just shook his head and took a bite of asparagus.

“Oh…weird.” She had a hard time believing she didn’t tell him her good news, but chose to move on. “But this would make my schedule a little easier for leaving town,” she theorized optimistically.

“That’s true. Though we barely leave town as it is,” he pointed out.

She swallowed a bite of chicken. “You guys are going on tour again,” she reminded.

“Yeah, but you don’t have to feel obligated to go on the road. Especially after last time.”

Julianna decided to let the topic end and took another sip.

“You nailed the temperature for this chicken,” he complimented after swallowing a piece and pointing to the plate with his fork.

An hour later the couple moved to the living room after cleaning up their dishes and putting the rest of the dinner away. The music playing on the stereo for the holiday spirit had switched from Christmas songs to some easy-listening instrumental tunes. Julianna rested her cheek below Peter’s shoulder as they comfortably slow-danced to the music. She felt so grateful she could spend an easy holiday at home without any big, extravagant plans, and she was so happy it was with him. Peter occasionally sighing contently and running his hand through her hair was enough at this point for her to know he felt the same. She leaned up to peck the side of his chin as he tightened the embrace.

Near ten minutes to midnight, Julianna felt herself awaken on the couch to the soft sound of a piano playing. After their impromptu dance on the floor, they enjoyed some of the chocolate dessert she had put in the fridge earlier; and then settled on the couch to idly chat. Which is what she assumed they were still doing when she dozed off unplanned. She got her wits as she angled herself for a better view of Peter while still laying down. He was playing a piece she couldn’t recognize, though it was pleasant.

“That sounded nice,” she breathed with a smile when he finished.

“Thanks,” he replied beaming slightly. Julianna then noticed he appeared to be in a somewhat pensive state.

“What are you thinking?”

“Oh, not much. It’s just…I learned that piece when I was 9, and…I always figured I’d get better with it as I aged…But it still sort of feels like how I played it when I was a kid…Do you get what I mean?” He asked unsure of himself.

“Not really. Sorry,” she softly answered with an apologetic smile.

“Ah, well. That’s alright,” he assured her.

“It sounded great to me either way,” she assured back.

He ran a hand through his hair while letting out a breath. “Well, I guess that’s what matters in the end,” he concluded with a tired smile.

She yawned as she stretched and chose to just comfortably study his current appearance of glasses, brown wool sweater and dark denim pants. “You know, the older you become, the more you really lean into the college professor attire.”

He chuckled. “Yeah, I should’ve warned in advance.”

“No way. This is such a turn on for me,” she revealed with a smirk.

Peter stepped away from the piano and sat on the edge of the couch next to where Julianna lay. “That bookworm trope is still relevant, I see,” he teased while holding her hand. Right after he leaned down to kiss her, she sat up and paused his next motive. 

“I think we should take this upstairs since it’s gotten so late,” she suggested.

He nodded and stood up while still holding her hand as she followed suit. “Good thinking per usual,” he said pleasantly.

Once they reached the stairs, Peter stopped walking. “Hey…you know, midnight is technically the next day…”

She didn’t miss his hint in the comment. “Alright, we can open the presents now,” she relented while failing to hold back a grin. 

He instantly perked up and pecked her cheek before rushing off. “God, you’re like a 12-year-old,” she joked as she left to grab a plain white envelope from her designated desk in the corner of the living room. It had become her personal spot in the house where she currently had basic supplies along with books, planner and journals.

“I’m more excited to see you open yours,” he claimed happily while returning with two smallish gifts. He held out one of the boxes when she momentarily placed the envelope in the back pocket of her jeans. Julianna grabbed the gift from her boyfriend and carefully unwrapped it. 

“Well, you get points for doing your own wrapping and not just asking the store employee’s assistance,” she jested warmly. When she lifted the lid, she found a nice, formal looking stationary set. It wasn’t until she picked one of the cards up did she realize her name was custom added to the front in cursive. “Aw, Pete. This is very sweet of you,” she glanced up at him with an appreciative smile. When she went to raise her hand for an embrace, he held out the second gift.

“Wait, there’s more!” He cheered before she unwrapped again. This time she found a new watch, something she was actually planning on buying herself, and was impressed he seemed to sense that on his own. She had presently just been wearing a digital wristwatch at work, but the one in the gift box was an old-fashioned analog watch that looked possibly vintage as well. 

“Well, this is lovely,” she gleamed again. “And a lot fancier than the one I have from the mall,” she considered while admiring the item.

“Yeah, you know, the Nike store just didn’t have that right amount of class you exude,” he claimed peacefully. 

She placed the gifts on one of the stairs. “Thank you,” she said happily and hugged him. She heard him sigh then run his hand up and down her back. She leaned into the embrace more before she kissed him. They let the moment drift a bit more passionately with a tiny moan escaping Julianna until she sensed something touch the bottom of her back. 

“Ah-ha,” Peter quipped as he caught the envelope in her pocket. She coolly leaned on the stair railing while he opened his own present. The front of the envelope had his name written in her cursive handwriting with a little Santa sticker next to it. When he flipped it upside down, a brand new guitar pick fell out, which he managed to catch just in time. “I could always use more of these.”

“Your usual ones have been looking a little worse for wear,” she commented casually.

He just smiled in response as he opened the folded paper inside, which turned out to not be a letter, but the current itinerary for the early spring tour dates abroad. On the very bottom of the guest list, he spotted Julianna’s name highlighted. “Oh, Jules…” He said in shock, but also some excitement. 

“I called Ward last week about adding me to the trips,” she revealed comfortably.

“But you hate traveling. I don’t want you to feel—”

“I don’t. I really want to go this time,” she insisted. “I chose to be in a relationship with someone who travels for work regularly. I can compromise once in a while. You’ve already done more favors for me than was really necessary anyways.”

“What about the new position at the library?” He continued, still processing the context of her holiday gift.

She shrugged a shoulder. “If they really want me that much, they can wait an extra month.”

He placed the piece of paper and pick back in the envelope before giving her another warm hug. “Thank you for making Christmas perfect.” He ended the moment by kissing her lips before she held his hand as they strolled upstairs to bed.


	2. Till Then

Ch. 2: Till Then

San Francisco, January 1997

The following week, Peter and Julianna concluded the holiday season festivities by attending a neighborhood costume party on New Year’s Eve. They were more acquaintances than friends with their neighbors, but it was an open invitation to the residents and the couple were game for trying something different this year. Julianna felt like making use of a fairytale dress she’d gotten back in October at one of the more high-end Halloween stores in San Fran, but ultimately didn’t end up wearing that month. The dress was white with sleeves that were puffy on the top and tight on her forearms. A slightly poofy long skirt and a bright yellow bodice wrapped around her stomach and back; with the neckline low enough to show a mild amount of cleavage. For shoes that would be barely seen under the dress, she chose just a pair of simple brown ankle boots and kept her hair down with all her natural, voluminous curls. A simple necklace chain hanged just below her collarbone and to top the whole costume off was a homemade flower crown with pink and yellow blossoms. Julianna made the latter herself with the helpful advice from a co-worker at the library who just happened to be a modern hippie with a green thumb.

Peter matched the fairytale theme of Julianna’s look more modestly with a set of fabric maille armor and his regular dark boots. There was an accompanying plastic helmet, though he wasn’t wearing it presently, which the younger woman figured was because of his glasses. 

At 8:15 PM, Julianna exited the bedroom with one of her smaller bags hanging lightly on the crook of her right arm to see Peter was casually leaning next to the front door. “Okay, I’m ready now.”

He looked up with a quick chuckle. “Jesus, you are so out of my league.”

“I know,” she agreed nonchalantly. “Good thing looks aren’t everything.”

He laughed once more before checking his pocket to make sure he had his keys and wallet. “You wear vanity well.”

“Well your friends do a good job of reminding me how hot I supposedly am,” she stated plainly.

“Really? Who?” Peter asked now amused. “James?”

“No, not James,” she corrected. “He’s too nice.”

“Who?” He asked again.

“It doesn’t matter,” she claimed.

“Well, I’d like to know who I’m familiar with is chatting up my girlfriend,” he carried with the same light tone, though Julianna could tell he was also serious.

“That’s not what happened,” she explained. “I just overheard a couple times when they didn’t know I was around.”

“Who—”

“You know what, forget I said anything. It’s really not a big deal,” she cut off suddenly and placed her arm around his shoulder. “Let’s go before most of the food is eaten.”

Peter wasn’t happy with the resolution to the topic, but let it slide presently. He wrapped his own arm around her and ran the other hand through her hair. “Your costume is stellar,” he complimented before letting go.

“Thanks. So is yours for all the three minutes you spent putting it on, I’m sure,” she teased with a smirk.

“Hey, I already did this look thirty years ago on the show,” he joked. “Although if you were our Princess Gwen, NBC might not have cancelled us so quickly.”

Julianna guffawed genuinely. “I’m not quite sure I have the same timing and repartee as Mike. Even with the additional bust.”

Peter opened the door and motioned for her to step out first, which she did. “Love that you went with no make-up too,” he said closing the door.

“Oh, Pete, I am wearing make-up,” she revealed while he locked the house.

“You are?!” He sounded shocked.

“Yes,” she confirmed. “A thin layer of foundation, two light brushes of blush on each cheek, a layer of mascara on my top lashes and a transparent lip gloss. Took me about 20 minutes to get this ‘no make-up’ look.”

“So what you’re saying is…this is the most make-up I’ve ever seen on you.”

She laughed. “Probably.” She set her bag’s strap over her shoulder before they began walking to the other side of the neighborhood. 

The party turned out to be fun, but not too wild, as the age bracket appeared to be pretty broad and anywhere from 30-60 years old. Peter told Julianna to grab a glass of wine once they showed up, but she was fine settling on a virgin cocktail at the open bar. While they comfortably chatted and socialized with the other guests, Julianna kept her arm around Peter more than she would have two years ago when she first moved in with him; now a whole level more comfortable with PDA this far into the relationship. By the time midnight rolled around, she downed the rest of her second drink and embraced Peter for a holiday kiss with him gladly responding.

“Happy New Year,” she whispered with a smile.

“Happy New Year, Juli,” he replied just as joyously.

“Here’s to London,” she toasted.

Peter face lit up at the reminder. “Oh, yeah, that’s right. That’s happening soon.”

“Mm-hm,” she agreed with her arms settled on his shoulders.

His own arms tightened around her back. “No pressure, of course, if you want to stay home since—”

“Nope. I’m going. Unless you’re trying to get rid of me,” she teased.

He laughed. “Of course not.”

“I’ve never been to Europe before,” she pondered leisurely. “I’m excited for that new experience if anything.”

“I’m glad,” he said smiling and kissed her one more time.

****

LA, March 1997

Julianna yawned for a third time that late night at LAX as she was waiting to board a private flight with Peter for the Monkees’ first leg of their ’97 tour. She sat with a full backpack as a carry-on for the two-and-a-half week long visit to England, while Peter stood by with his own bag and a paper coffee cup filled with tea. Both were dressed down in jeans and sweatshirts, with Julianna’s hair in a loose bun. The crowd around them consisted mostly of the rest of the band, their guests, Ward, a few PR people, the hired roadies and a couple of press correspondents. Also traveling with the pop group was the alt-rock band Nancy Boy, who included Mike’s son Jason as the guitarist and also another famous offspring in Donovan Leitch Jr. as vocalist, hired for the tour’s opener. The band was more along the lines of UK bands like Pulp and Suede than any of the grunge bands in the US, also making them a bit different than the usual acts selected for Monkees concerts. 

Julianna glanced up from her current trance, to see Victoria walking up to them with three bags and Mike a couple feet behind her with his own backpack. Unlike Julianna who was in the most comfortably casual outfit she owned, Victoria still looked trendy with a blue buttoned up sweater and what the other woman assumed were designer pants. Her sunglasses were presently still set on top of her long hair.

“Phew,” she exclaimed while dropping her bags next to Julianna. “Imagine how much more convenient work flights would be if they were always at night instead of early morning.”

“I wouldn’t get too excited yet,” Julianna casually warned. “It’ll be almost evening by the time we land anyway. That’s why I’m going to try and force myself to stay awake for most of the 10 hours in the air to dodge jetlag.”

Before Victoria could respond, Mike appeared beside her and dropped a tiny box in Julianna’s lap. The librarian jumped slightly in surprise before noticing it was a pack of gum. 

“I heard this was your first time flying, so I thought I’d give you a little tip,” he explained. “If you regularly chew on something throughout the flight your ears shouldn’t pop too much.”

“Thanks,” Julianna replied while picking up the pack. “But I’ve actually flown before. This is just my first time out of the country,” she revealed with a lopsided smile.

Mike shrugged. “Consider it a treat then.”

She shook her head airily at his nonchalance. 

“Yeah, and this might make up for the fact I forgot to grab pretzels before leaving the house,” Peter added.

“I have your pretzels in my bag,” Julianna informed plainly.

“Really?” He asked surprised. “Huh, guess you forgot to mention it,” he wondered.

She barely reacted to the accusation. “Well this can make us even for when you forgot to tell me about your band rehearsal in the house last month.” She reminded him of his more modest band he played with outside of the Monkees.

Peter laughed. “Jules, it was one day and we played in the garage the whole time.”

“It was my day off and most of the street could probably hear you,” she claimed. “But it’s fine. I’ve moved on already.”

“Doesn’t sound like it—”

“Hey, gang!” Micky suddenly popped up in front of the foursome. Julianna secretly relieved the sometime drummer curbed any possibility of an argument right before such a big trip. “Victoria, Julianna,” he added acknowledging his bandmates’ significant others. “Is everyone ready to spend March in England?!” He asked in an over-the-top animated voice like a school coach. Victoria nodded with a chuckle. “Great! Because our ride’s here,” he ended with a completely blasé tone before leaving for the intended location.

Mike and Victoria picked their stuff back up and followed Micky, while Peter and Julianna walked behind the other couple. Peter paused Julianna’s feet to get her attention with a sympathetic tone. “Hey…if you’re still bothered by the rehearsal—”

“I’m not. Honestly, I don’t know why I brought it up,” she insisted before opening her backpack and pulling out a snack bag. “Here.” She handed the bag to Peter. “And I’m sorry I didn’t tell you I grabbed your snack.”

He let out a light laugh. “Don’t be. It’s hardly a big thing,” he assured while linking his arm through hers. “Let’s go have some fun across the pond.”

For the first half of the flight, Julianna and Victoria sat next to each other to catch up as it had been a couple months since they last hung out together. They started with just some idle chatting before settling on reading and using their headphones for music. After a few hours, Julianna moved to where Peter was sitting and the pair viewed one of the in-flight movies. At a little under eight hours of being in the air, Julianna pulled her hair out of her bun and let out a big yawn as she rested her head on the passenger seat. She rubbed her eye sleepily, only intending to close her eyes for a second…

Next thing she knew, Julianna felt her senses awakening with what she couldn’t tell was lips or fingertips brushing her face. Only a moment later the peck on her lips confirmed it was indeed lips. She smiled into the kiss before slowly opening her eyes to discover Peter above her with his own smile. “Hi,” she breathed.

“Hi,” he responded and ran a hand through her curls. 

“How long was I out?” 

“About two hours,” he answered.

She exhaled again and sat up to stretch while he gave her some space.

“Welcome to jolly, old London,” he greeted with a mock-up accent.

She giggled and tossed her hair over her shoulders. “Cool. Or should I say ‘wicked?’”


	3. Just a Game

Ch. 3: Just a Game

London, March 1997

The first week of the tour flew by quicker than Julianna might have wanted. She knew it would be a full schedule between all the concerts, promos, soundchecks, after-parties, meet & greets and driving to venues; plus making time for regular things like eating, bathing and sleeping. But fortunately she made the most of it with as much activity as she could. When she wasn’t tagging along backstage or at soundchecks or even at a quick interview or soundbite in the morning; Julianna, Victoria and Gillian would sometimes spend the first half of the day exploring London. Whether it was at a few of the high-end stores Victoria wanted to shop at or venturing over to some of the famous landmarks like Big Ben or Buckingham Palace. Probably the most unexpected aspect of the tour Julianna found was that Mike’s mood had very quickly dropped after only a couple shows. She later discovered the music critics covering the concerts weren’t too impressed with his live guitar playing. The Californian could understand how that might be frustrating, as he hadn’t performed most of these songs in three decades unlike the rest of the band. But from her perspective she didn’t hear anything wrong with his playing, even if she wasn’t a musician. She hoped that the journalists would lighten up as the tour progressed, not only because she was friends with the group, but because Mike wasn’t particularly the most pleasant person to be around in a bad mood.

But one nice surprise was that Julianna and Victoria found themselves getting along with the guys in Nancy Boy, and occasionally chatted with them before or after shows while the Monkees were busy. In retrospect, it probably wasn’t a big surprise, since the younger bandmates were near the ages of the two girlfriends. Even more fortunate they were completely friendly and didn’t steer out of line to flirt with their chatting. Though it did cross Julianna’s mind to wonder how strictly friendly they would be if she or Victoria were available and not with their fellow tour mates. 

Currently the librarian was casually standing on the edge of the concert stage and speaking with Nigel Mogg, Nancy Boy’s bassist and one of the Brits in the band. They were in the middle of a conversation on how Julianna was enjoying the cultural differences between the UK and the US. When Nigel kidded about how a burger and fries could never level up to fish and chips, Julianna let out a laugh and then instantly a squeal. An arm had rapidly wrapped around her waist, lifted her up off the floor and carried her over to the other end of the stage in a rush. She laughed again, this time in shock at Peter’s surprise. “Well, that was fun. Albeit a bit rude,” she ended referring to how her talk with Nigel was now interrupted.

“Just wanted to see my favorite librarian for a bit,” he said while nuzzling in between her neck and shoulder briefly.

She released a third light laugh before passing a puzzled expression. “I’ve been here the whole time, so I’m not sure what that’s supposed to mean.”

“Well, I’ve just noticed you’ve made a few new friends lately,” he said motioning over to Nigel, who was now talking to his bandmate, drummer Mike Williams. 

“I suppose so,” she agreed airily. 

“And it can be especially nice when the new friend is a pretty lady,” he claimed.

She arched an eyebrow. “That almost sounds like jealousy. Which would be unusual since you’re not the type.”

“Well, I didn’t have this kind of competition before,” he countered.

Julianna continued to be perplexed. “What are you talking about?”

He pointed to the other side of the stage, which now had all four band members. “A musically talented, good looking group of young guys. I can see what the appeal might be,” he added with a slightly meta reference to his own band thirty years ago.

“I didn’t date guys like that before we met, so I don’t know why I suddenly would now,” she insisted coolly. “I think you’re enough for me on that end already,” she said placing her arm loosely on his shoulder.

“Really? You don’t see the appeal at all?” He asked while wrapping his own arm around her waist.

The brunette glanced back to the younger men beyond her. “Well, Don’s with Gwyneth and his personality is a bit more…colorful than I usually go for. Jason has a girlfriend too. Plus I’ve worked with his dad and am friends with Victoria, so that would be weird. And the others…I don’t know. I haven’t really given it much thought since I’m not single anyway.”

“They’ve given it thought,” Peter declared.

Julianna continued to be unconvinced. “Or maybe they just see me as an acquaintance,” she suggested as if anything else would be ridiculous.

A hearty chuckle escaped Peter at the suggestion. The younger woman wasn’t as amused and instead wrapped her other arm around him and pulled him into a kiss. The attempt to distract him from his irrational suspicion succeeded with him tightening the embrace. Julianna pulled away a second after he slightly parted his lips, mostly because they were around friends and colleagues. She gave his shoulder a quick squeeze as he let out a breath. “I’m going to go over and hang out with Victoria in the wings,” she informed while pointing to the area she referred to. “And then I’m going to assume you’ll stop acting weird by the time the show’s done later,” she concluded with an optimistic grin before leaving the stage for her friend. Julianna’s prediction turned out to be primarily true, with the concert just as fun as the rest and Peter’s mood transitioning back to his usual self.

****

A week later, Peter and Julianna returned to their hotel room late at night after a small after-party following the second-to-last concert of the tour. Both were a bit spent, but for different reasons.

“Well, that was fun,” Peter commented with a yawn while closing the door behind her.

“Yeah…I particularly enjoyed you not bothering to back me up while I was debating with Mike,” she reminded drolly.

He turned to her blasély. “He had a point. Small business probably will start booming if the Internet turns out to be a feasible platform.”

“I work a government funded position. I’d rather not lose my job from a private sector,” Julianna argued a little peeved.

“Well, it’s not like you’re going to. People will always need books, as we both have proved,” he insisted while tossing the hotel room key on the nightstand.

“That’s not the point,” she continued annoyed. “You both said it like it was no big deal.”

“Does it really matter. Sounded like you already had enough support for your argument from Jesse and Nigel,” he asserted rhetorically.

She huffed tiredly at the comment. “You’re still on about that? I don’t understand why. You like all of my friends at the library.”

“Because they seem like good people and I trust them. Plus a lot of the staff are women,” he detailed.

Julianna rolled her eyes. “Okay, so you don’t trust your own bandmate’s son’s band? Who you lobbied to be a part of this tour and agreed had talent?”

“Well, they do have talent. That’s not what I’m worried about,” he claimed while she effortlessly dropped her jacket on top of an open suitcase.

“Isn’t this a bit hypocritical? You’re a musician too,” she said stopping in front of the bed.

“Yes, which is why I know what they’re fully capable of taking advantage of. I was in the same position as them at their age.”

“Didn’t we already resolve this issue over summer?” She continued still not convinced.

“Big difference between an ordinary barista and a rock musician,” Peter persisted. “They’re definitely interested in you.”

She sighed while taking a seat on the edge of the bed. “Well, I think I’m a little old for their brand of groupie. I’m 30, not 20.”

“Doesn’t matter when the girl’s as attractive as you,” he countered bluntly while she just shook her head. “And you are the exact type musicians fall for.”

“I can’t help it if that’s true. Need I remind you, you are literally the only musician I’ve ever been with,” she pushed strongly. 

“Yeah, and now maybe someone closer to your age with the same perks would be even more intriguing,” he theorized heavily.

“You’re being ridiculous, Peter,” Julianna insisted once again. “I didn’t start going out with you because you had a guitar. I liked that you were funny and nice and cute and talented and smart and a dozen other great adjectives.”

The older man rubbed the back of his neck while exhaling a deep, conflicted breath. She stood up and placed her hands on his shoulders and rubbed them gently for a moment. “Stop being paranoid for a second and relax. Please,” she requested and pulled him into a hug. A smile formed when she felt him return the embrace and play with her curls.

“You have no idea how hard it is.”

“How hard what is?”

“Being with someone as perfect as you and hoping you don’t leave for someone better,” Peter confessed quietly.

Julianna frowned and leaned away from his body to look at him properly. “What do you mean? I’m hardly perfect.”

“Well…it’s difficult to be with someone who gives so much without needing anything in return,” he clarified mildly.

She couldn’t tell where this was going. “I’m not sure what you mean by that. I have a ton of needs, just like you. Just like everyone.”

“Yeah…and maybe I’m holding you back from fulfilling them the same way with someone more appropriate and with less baggage,” he guessed again.

Julianna dropped her arms and stepped aside with another frustrated sigh. “Peter, come on. This is exhausting.”

He raised his hand diligently. “Ah ha, see, you are bothered by it—”

“Because you won’t drop the subject,” she stated and raised her arms again to hold his own after rubbing her temple. “I love you and all your imperfections included. I know you feel the same about me,” she stressed as calmly as she could.

Peter took a breath and rested his hands around her waist. “You’d be able to drink and smoke again,” he offered.

She gave a small lopsided grin. “Not worth it. Besides I think you were a rather good influence on me not smoking anymore,” she professed casually.

“Or weed,” he pondered again.

Julianna snorted at the suggestion. “Even less chance of me getting interested in that. And you already know that.”

He continued gazing at her. “You’re such a catch,” he said while he carefully tossing some of her hair over her left shoulder. He let his hand rest on her neck which made her eyes close with a grin. “You could be with anyone you want.”

She opened her eyes. “I didn’t want just anyone, I wanted you. The fact that I’ve spent half a month in England on your tour should be obvious enough,” she concluded tightening her arms around his back.

“There’s still time for you to leave with someone else. Jason and his guys seem pretty smooth,” he brought back.

“Peter, even if Chris, Nigel or Jesse intentionally made a move on me, I still wouldn’t reciprocate. Give me some credit,” she pushed irritated. “When have I ever given the impression I would throw myself at the next famous guy who is interested in me? I didn’t even let you into my pants after our first date.”

“Well, technically you did. But it was just my hand,” he corrected bluntly.

The brunette was speechless, not expecting him to actually take the bait. After a long pause with her face dropping in disappointment, she stepped away from him. She turned and grabbed her sweater and the room’s key on her way to the front door.

“Where are you going?” He asked.

“I don’t know…I think I need a break,” she used as an excuse before leaving the room.

****

Julianna eventually made it all the way down to the bar on the first floor of the hotel. With it being so late at night, there were only three other customers in the location. She ordered a white wine as an excuse to sit at one of the high-top tables, but was currently only halfway finished with the glass. She sat with her chin lazily propped up on her palm as she mulled over how the night had gone. She wasn’t happy with Peter’s apparent insecurity over her being friendly with the younger, male musicians on the tour. She really had no intention of being anything more than platonic with them, which should have been already obvious since she was in a committed relationship. Plus there was a very low chance she would see any of Nancy Boy again after the tour concluded. Julianna then considered Peter was experiencing a middle age thing, and if so, she was a little impressed it took this long for the age difference to take effect on his end. But ultimately, she worried this might turn into a new issue for them. 

Right as she took a sip of her wine, she glanced up to see Micky stroll through the room. He noticed her only a moment later and smiled while raising his hand to her as an acknowledgment. He ordered a beer to the bartender on the way to her table and took a seat on the opposite end. 

“Julianna,” he greeted lightly. 

“Hi, Micky,” she replied just as casually and attempted a small grin.

“Why the long face?” He asked instantly noticing her somber mood. “That’s not the expression we usually see at the end of a tour. Well, except from the fans.”

“Oh, well…” Julianna tried to think of a basic explanation to her predicament. “I just needed some space for a little bit.”

“Lovers’ quarrel?” He asked as his beer arrived at the table. 

She crinkled her brow as she considered the question. “I guess so. I’m not sure what’s going on between me and Peter at the moment. I thought we had resolved our relationship problems while in LA. But now…”

“It’s probably just a temporary hiccup,” the vocalist suggested. “Stress from the hectic schedule.”

“I hope so. Would be a waste since the rest of the trip was so nice,” she contemplated while playing with her wine glass. “Sorry I’m not the perfect girlfriend you thought I was for him,” she added dryly.

He smirked before raising his beer glass for a gulp. “I wasn’t exactly expecting you to be 100% flawless, you know,” he teased after swallowing the liquid.

Julianna smiled again, though not completely convinced. “I’m sure I can’t literally be the best girlfriend he’s ever had. Even back then. I know Reine sounded…polarizing. But Leah seemed nice.”

“Oh, Leah was fine,” Micky agreed. “Actually, I think the girl to make the biggest impression on him when were young wasn’t a girlfriend.”

“Oh?” The younger woman was intrigued.

“Yeah. More like a friend of the group for a couple of years,” he continued. “She was one of our press correspondents.”

“I didn’t know this,” Julianna said suddenly interested. “What happened to her?”

“Hey, you lot.”

Before Micky could expand on the topic, Davy and Gillian were in front of them. “You know, nothing ever really closes in this town before sunrise, if you want to find a real drink.”

Julianna smiled at the native Brit’s suggestion and stood up from her seat. “Thanks, but it’s gotten really late. I think I should be moving towards bed now,” she decided. “See you guys tomorrow,” she parted with a light wave, which they returned. 

Despite her claim and now genuinely feeling a bit sleepy, Julianna took a rather slow pace to the hotel bedroom. Mostly because she wasn’t sure if Peter would already be asleep or not. Moments later, the elevator door opened just as she stepped in front of it to push the ‘up’ button. When the door finished sliding open, the curly brunette was unexpectedly greeted with Victoria, who appeared to be completely dressed along with two bags on her arm and her sunglasses on top of her head. “Oh, hey Juli. You’re still up? I thought maybe you would be in bed already,” she started while walking out of the elevator.

“Well, that’s where I’m headed actually,” she revealed. “What’s with the bags?”

“Ugh, about to get on a red-eye,” Victoria answered drolly. “I’m not a big fan of last minute ideas, but you know Mike and his tendency for the unpredictable.”

“Wait, why? What’s going on?”

The model placed one of her carry-on bags over a shoulder before continuing. “Oh, we’re heading back to California. Won’t that be fun arriving in the middle of the night.” Right as the words left her mouth, Victoria’s face gradually turned to concerned. “Shit…you weren’t supposed to know that.”

“What?” Julianna asked after a long, puzzled pause. “What do you mean you’re going to California? There’s one more show…We’re literally going back home in two days anyway,” She explained at her friend’s comments.

“Uh, yeah. Let’s just say we…had a change of plans,” Victoria ambiguously claimed with the other woman just reacting blankly. “Something’s come up and Mike would rather, er, leave now. So…we’re going,” she paused to pick up her smaller bag while Julianna listened. “And you’re not going to mention this to anyone. And then I’ll see you in a couple of months, right? Right, alright. Um, okay, see you later.” She ended the awkward speech by hugging Julianna before rushing through the lobby. 

The fellow brunette’s eyes followed to see where her friend’s destination was, which was apparently a town car waiting by the hotel entrance with Mike in the backseat. Julianna had a big feeling there was a more controversial side to that half-baked excuse Victoria just made-up. And she had a feeling it was going to be longer than a couple of months before they saw each other again.

Once Julianna finally made it to the bedroom, she found Peter asleep in bed. She tossed the hotel key on the stand by the door, sat on the edge of the bed, and pondered on what she should do with the rather important, though secret information she just learned. After leaning forward to kiss the spot between his neck and his ear, she bit the side of her lip before ultimately speaking. “…If I tell you a really bad secret…do you promise not to kill the messenger?...”


End file.
